It's Been One Year

Exactly a year ago today I uploaded my first blog post. It doesn’t feel like it’s been so long in between. I can remember the exact position and moment I uploaded it. My legs were folded underneath me as I was wrapped up in a woolly blanket. I would type a few words then a maze would form on my forehead between my eyebrows and I would press the backspace. I wanted it to be the best it could be, my best. Finally I identified that the chances of me looking back at it and cringing were very high and that was inevitable. So I agreed with myself that it may have not been my best, but my best is changing constantly: up and down.

After I wrote the paragraph above I read my first blog post Let's See Where This Goes and coincidently I talk about what I wrote above, I guess I haven’t changed as much as I thought I had.

A year. It doesn’t feel like it’s been twelve whole months since I uploaded my first post. Having this space, this place where I can write my thoughts or document memories has really brightened my life. I’m so grateful for this. Recently I've been wanting to try different things, different ways to write on different things. I can't pick a favourite blog post, many hold different memories that I want to hold onto. If you have a favourite out of all my blog posts please let me know in the comments below because it would be really interesting to know which ones you like the most.

If you've been reading my blog since the start, or any time in between, or have only just read this today, thank you. Thank you for taking the time to read words that I have written.

Don't Just Follow Your Dreams, Chase Them

I’ve mentioned 'dreams' before in this post Dreaming Big Enough but since then I’ve been thinking. It’s important to dream big but using the word ‘dream’ shouldn’t make it unrealistic and unattainable. Dreams are associated with images and desires that are created in sleep or out of fiction. They should be what make us build the foundations for. Something that could be rather than what could not be.

Dreams provide us with motivation and effort. But some days we lack the courage to actually believe they could become a reality. In all honesty they could not but that’s only inevitable if we sit and wait. You have to go out and do something. Dreams don’t come to you. That’s what makes them dreams. Dreams are achieved from hard work and persistence. If a dream truly is your dream that you desire then you will do everything in your power you can do to reach it. And if you’ve done everything you could have done and your dream doesn’t become a reality then perhaps it wasn’t meant to be and there’s something else better waiting for you.

Chasing your dreams may be a hard route but that will contribute to the accomplishment of attaining your goal. No dream worth receiving is an easy one. This may sound cheesy but I mean it when I say go out now and chase your dream.

The Sea Has Stolen My Heart

I'm not really sure what to call this. I guess we could call the following a bunch of lines, thoughts and words. It’s something different nonetheless. Hope you like it.

I thought I was content with the town I lived in
But I’ve been opened up to the rest of the world
Now the window won’t shut, there’s no going back
Someone’s taken the key and won’t give it back

A button is pressed and time remains asleep
It fills my eyes, then lingers in the back of my mind
When I’m away it climbs into my conscience
This may sound like nonsense.

Birds waltz across the water of the sky
They decorate the azure blue
Everything’s calm but moving
And leaves me wondering

It’s a home with no bed but always light

Your neighbour is the overlapping water at the edge
Serenity blows off the sand, beauty lies in front of you
Give it a chance and it may steal your heart too from you  

Beauty

A man once said 'A person who has good thoughts cannot ever be ugly. You can have a wonky nose and a crooked mouth and a double chin and stick-out teeth, but if you have good thoughts they will shine out of your face like sunbeams and you will always look lovely.' This man was called Roald Dahl.

It got me thinking. Thinking about perfection, beauty and all the other words associated with being flawless. All of us encounter the burden to emulate a certain illusion of perfection each day: In magazines, music videos, films, on billboards, on television, it dances in front of our eyes.

This perfect picture of the meant-to-be body results in people looking into the mirror and being disappointed that their reflection does not replicate the ones in the media. But how can simple images contribute to someone wanting to change their own body? Nearly all of the bodies used in the media have been altered. Technology has enabled people to change bodies in images to something different, something that they aren't. Images of models are changed to have slimmer thighs, smaller waists and fewer blemishes. How can people strive for something in reality that only exists by virtue of a computer programme?

It's not real. An illusion of the 'perfect' body has been made. It's fake, artificial. In reality there's no definition of perfect. Only the beautiful thing of human beings being different is perfect.

We shouldn't be judging others because of their appearances. Can we start the path to changing the definition of beauty today.

Someone who is pretty or beautiful should be one who shares happy thoughts and radiates happiness into society. A kind, generous human being is beautiful. Those qualities are the ones that matter. Why are people first blinded by whether someone has shiny hair or not as to whether they are pretty or not.

So hopefully at least one of you reading this will consider adopting this new definition of beauty. And by the way happy fourth of July!

Remember Me?

I took this photo of a good friend of mine a few weeks ago on a walk

 

As I type these words, it’s like catching up with an old friend. I may have been gone but my love for blogging hasn’t diminished. I’ve missed this.

I am sitting on a stool in one of my favourite places. Loud words are sung into my ears by some singer called LP. I’m not sure. A started chocolate bar lies beside my keyboard. GCSE exams and end of year exams are done, almost. And I'm exhausted. My body refuses to move but I’m overwhelmed by happiness to be free from revising daily.

 

The idea of next year and doing the majority of my GCSEs does slightly scare me but I’m reminding myself that once I do those exams I won’t have to carry on doing the subjects which don’t fill me with joy. As well as I will be given weeks to do what I want following the end of GCSEs unlike this year when I have to carry on going into lessons and completing controlled assessments.

 

This time revising for end of year exams was put on the back seat until after I finished my last GCSE exam as it was at the bottom of my priorities list below various GCSE controlled assessments. Consequently last weekend was filled with cramming information from the last year or two. Well I tried to cram. Since my last GCSE exam on Thursday my body had decided that it was allergic to revising or even reading textbooks. Nonetheless I walked into those end of year exams and tried my best.

 

I now have time. Time to do what I’ve wanted to do for weeks. Write. So if there's anything you want me to write about in the next few weeks let me know in the comments below.

May

I thought I would grab the chance to write this Sunday.

I don’t think I’ve written a post yet reflecting on a whole month so hope you enjoy.

Honestly it feels like it was new year only yesterday. We are already nearly through half the year! This year in particular for some reason I’ve been reminding myself to ‘seize the day’ as much as I can. I guess this is partially due to the fact that I leave school in three years and a bit.

This month I had quite a few opportunities to visit the sea, which I’ve fallen in love with by the way. One of my highlights when we visited the sea was when we walked along the beach in the late evening. As you know if you’ve been around since Christmas, I’m slightly obsessed with lights. The photo above showing the lights just doesn’t justify how special the place was.

A few months ago I would never have thought I would be able to balance seeing my friends and revising for certain GCSE’s. But I’ve been fortunate enough that everything has worked itself out. Fingers crossed next year is alright. If I’ve learnt anything from this in the school work area, be prepared. Revise beforehand and therefore you won’t have to work as much the days before your exams and you will feel more relaxed and comfortable.

If you’re going through the revision and exams period at the moment, just remember there’s summer. And give yourself a break every so often.



Stuck In A Hole

Maybe I’m the only one but I sense I’m not after talking to other people and reading what others have written before. 

Sometimes unconsciously I get trapped in this hole. There’s no way to escape until someone eventually walks by and offers me a hand. That can be quick or can take days.

I’ve noticed when I’ve been so busy dealing with stuff, such as, school, I’ve found it hard to write or come up with ideas of what to write. I’ve been wanting to write but I’ve just been stuck in this hole. I used to identify it as writer’s block. And I guess it still is. Just this time I think I know why it’s occurred.

It’s like when you’re ill.

When you are ill you find it hard to concentrate and do other things. Unfortunately you just have to be patience and wait to get better. I’m just having to hold onto that hope that when things do cool down again at school, writing will come.

I’ve been trying for a while to overcome this. But I fear that the quality of my writing has declined. I haven’t written the best I can and you deserve better whoever you are reading this. 

So writing enjoy your holiday. I’ll see you soon. 

Waking Up On The Wrong Side Of The Bed

I stumbled across this post, which I wrote one or two months back, in my drafts and thought why not just post it. This may be an odd one or possibly helpful. Hopefully the later.

I can’t remember why or when I made the decision. But one day I woke up and decided to believe whenever someone says a mean thing or does something that is thought of as mean is due to the fact that they had a bad night sleep or woke up on the wrong side of the bed. I don’t necessarily mean this literally. But it reminds me that everyone has a reason for doing or saying something. A lot of times I don’t know what’s going on in their life away from where I see them or what they’ve been through in life.

Of course there are some scenarios where what someone does is not acceptable because of the scale and cruelty of it. But I believe that no one was born ‘mean’. The reason for what has happened isn’t always a reason to support what they’ve done but it explains why they’ve done it. I don’t believe anyone just automatically wakes up in the morning and decides to be 'mean'.

There may be situations which I haven’t thought of where what I believe is not correct or appropriate. But at the moment it enables me to see the world in a lot brighter light.  Maybe you could give it a go.

A Trip To Canada: A Holiday To Never Forget

not the best quality but I took this from the inside of our car behind the window :D

As a result of all these exams at the moment coming up, I'm really missing the holidays so I thought it might be nice to reflect back on a very special holiday of mine that happened a few years ago.

We all have that group of places or holidays that we cherish. I’ve been very lucky in opportunities to travel to different places in my life so far for a fifteen year old. But one place has stood out the most. Even though its been years since I went.

As you have probably guessed from the title of this post, this special place is Canada.

It all started when I visited Canada for the first time during my last year at primary school. I was lucky enough to spend three weeks there.

Inevitably my memories have started to fade since then but I want to make sure I never forget how happy and that I did have one of the best times of my life there. I can’t pinpoint one thing that made it. It wasn’t necessarily a holiday filled with a couple of amazing experiences. Every day just carried on contributing to making it THE holiday.

I guess maybe it was so great since I had no expectations beforehand. It was so special due to the fact that I could never have predicted what was to come and how it would make me feel at home but at the same time like I was in a new and intriguing place.

The photos above show that I visited many rural areas but for a few days I was fortunate enough to visit a city that I’ve forgotten the name of… Someday I want to go back and explore more of Canada.

Where do you want to go to in the future?

Growing Up



I'm still unsure if this photo works, if you have any thoughts can you please let me know in the comments below

I suddenly thought I’m going to be sixteen this year. I don’t feel any older than I did when I was fourteen. When I’m living day to day I don’t feel like I’ve grown up at all but when I just stop and think, I notice.

I’m no longer the shy, little girl who used to hide behind her mum’s legs. For one I’m too tall now to hide behind my mum’s legs but if I think about it so much has changed.

I once was dressed by mum. I couldn’t tie my own hair up myself. I once couldn’t feed myself… that was a long time ago. Sometimes my family reminisce over my childhood memories and ask me if I remember them. Unfortunately I can only remember a few. We are all constantly growing up even our parents.

To me growing up includes learning about new things. Many things we know now, we wouldn’t have known if our curiosity hadn’t encouraged us to investigate things. I hope that one day I can discover more things. Things I could never have found if I didn’t follow my dreams.

We all have our own paths. But we don’t each have one path. We come to many cross sections in life where we have to make decisions. Sometimes we make those decisions unconsciously.

Our lives are unwritten stories. Tomorrow is another page.